Of Being a Mother (from my Father-in-Law)

I have known my in-laws for a little over a year now and I have grown to appreciate and love them. They are quiet protective and supportive of all our endeavors. They made sure that I will feel welcome and comfortable in my new home - Malaysia. And I am. Dad James, my father-in-law, is a quite fascinating character. He's very sensitive, thoughtful, wise, sociable, etc. We can talk just about anything, from social problems to home improvement, from Frank Sinatra's "My Way" to Beyonce's "If I Were a Boy", etc.

This past year that I have grown so close to them, not once did they ever ask me if I'm pregnant or when do we plan to have a baby. It helped me in many ways because I have been quite depress about not getting pregnant and there are days when it really gets inside my head and stay there like a malignant tumor. Anyways, going back to my father-in-law. Last night we had dinner together as a family (Dad James, Mum Annie, Nick, Dennis and myself) to celebrate his 57th birthday. We ate at Eighty Eight BBQ Steamboat Restaurant. We had so much fun because it was our first time to eat there and its eat all you can for reasonable price and you cook and grill your own food. You take your own ingredients and they have seafood station, meat, vegetables, dumplings, etc. There's ice cream too and it's bottomless! I had 3 bowls in 6 different flavors!We laughed at each other, even Nick (who is extremely reserved) was laughing too. It was my first time to see and hear him laugh.

Anyway, before I get sidetracked with the food stuff, going back to my father-in-law, this morning I received a forwarded e-mail from him. He loves to forward e-mails. Anyways, the title of the e-mail is "Being a Mother." And I thought, "Oh great! Now, I have to really work it." The message of course is just what the title implies. I guess because Dad James is not getting any younger that he probably is giving me a "wink, wink" of when is he going to be a grandfather. But then again, it might be one of his regular forwarded e-mails and he is probably not suggesting anything. But as for me, whose arms have been longing to cradle a tiny creature with small hands and feet; whose heart is longing to nurture a small creature that is a mixture of mine and Dennis' chromosomes....... (sigh)...... it's going to be a big challenge to not feel the "pressure" when I'm already putting so much on myself without anybody's help.

Anyways, anyone care for chocolates and ice cream? I could really use some just about now!